79 Days Later 

Today as of January 4, 2016, makes 79 days since you passed away Mom. To put that in perspective some more some might look at this the following way: (1) 6,825,600 seconds (2) 113,760 minutes, (3) 1,896 hours,  (4) 79 days, (5) 11.2857143 weeks, and (6) approximately 2.63333333 months.

I can’t say for sure if those numbers are 100% accurate, but it seems that they are a pretty good estimate just off hand.

Everything feels like it has continued to fall apart since you had to leave us. I will try not to get into too much detail, but all 3 of us kids have taken this so hard! Corrie is going through multiple things that I won’t go into detail about, Brian has went through his share of personal demons but he seems to be doing better since he moved in with grandma, and I have been going through expected ups and downs (plus some) to say the very least.

Nothing about this “grieving process” has been anything close to being something that one would consider to be “easy.” At this point, I think it’s safe to say that over the last month or so, I have cried a little less and things have appeared to look “up” for me more so than before. That doesn’t necessarily factor in the nights, or any other time of the day that I know I have spent, thinking about you, missing you, and crying over your absence.

My hope is that with 2016, that we can all find some sort of comfort or peace over your passing. Unfortunately, I have deep feeling in my gut that more pain, heartbreak, and hardships of some sort is in store for us in 2016 as well. Mom, I have done my best to stay strong for everyone in this family! Even when it’s felt like nothing short of impossible to do.

If you are really in heaven like a lot of people have tried to reassure me with, please don’t hesitate to watch over us as our guardian angel. Keep us safe throughout our travels (as you would say when you used to pray for us) and always keep close to us in spirit so that we keep all your words of wisdom and encouragement even closer to us.

I love you mommy! There hasn’t been a day that has gone by so far that I haven’t thought about you. I miss you!!!

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